
Recipes for Gingerbread Children
Yes, I finished the illustration. No, you didn’t see it wrong. Sherry Cobble, sitting between Todd Niland and Sandy Wickham is stark naked. She and her twin sister Shelly are dedicated naturists and go clothing-free whenever possible. That is just another bizarre detail in the life of a surrealist. At any moment you can encounter naked people. And not just when they are not wearing any clothes. Sometimes you see their bare souls through multiple layers of clothing.
And looking back over the last two years of posting every single day, I have to say it looks quite like I am not the only idiot who sometimes sees through clothing to the center of the person as if I were Superman with x-ray vision. (Come on, you always knew that Superman could tell you what color underwear the girls were wearing at any given moment.) My most popular post, Be Naked More, was written in December of 2015 and has been viewed 306 times in the last year. That’s almost once a day! I believe that proves that I am not the only pervert out there who can’t stop worrying about naked people.

Speaking of naked people, I just got the manuscript for Magical Miss Morgan back from the editor. It is a story based on the naked details of my teaching career. They want to change the title to Magical Ms. Morgan for some reason. I may have to argue that one a bit. But it also means I am well on my way to having another book published and in print. I will very probably be one of those writers who only loses money over being a writer. But I can accept that. Holding a copy of my own book in my hands is a worthy enough accomplishment for a Midwestern brick-brained cornfield philosopher like me.
My second most popular post is Maxfield Parrish Pictures which I wrote in 2014, but the one gaining the fastest is What You Should Know About Filipino Families at only 102 views. I wrote this because I have been married to a Filipina for 20 years, and I have learned a lot of laughable things about Pinoy culture that are worth sharing. 102 views suggests that not all of my Filipino relatives have seen it yet… not by a long-shot. But they generally have a good sense of humor and are far better at laughing at themselves than their current leader in the Philippines, the Pinoy Trump.

So how much longer can Mickian monkey-headed-ness continue on a daily basis? I don’t really know. I am in poor enough health to drop dead at any moment. I never imagined I could do every day for two straight years. But who knows? It is possible that writing regularly is what keeps me alive.

























Just Call Me Joe
Yes, the rain clouds are hanging over my old gray head. I am plunged deeply back into credit card debt by increases in property taxes, a lawsuit by Bank of America, the city forcing me to get the cracked pool repaired though I can’t afford to do anything more than fix it myself and rain keeps refilling it, a recent car accident, my wife forgetting to pay the phone bill for two months, and the @#%&! family dog chewing up another of my son’s expensive retainers. Good fortune occurs once in a blue moon, but bad fortune comes in daily waves.
So today is about complaining. Life sucks… in the sense of a vacuum cleaner (the addendum I always had to add as a school teacher whenever the word “sucks” was used in class). Life especially sucks (remember… vacuum cleaner) now that we have a dyspeptic orangutan running our country.
The answer, of course, is that we simply have to live with it. Life will go on. At least, until it doesn’t. We are all going to die some day. Humanity and life on earth will be extinct some day. We live within the borders of birth and death. The beginning and the end.
But life is actually like a book. It begins and ends. But the important part is the pages in between. And we can fill them with good things and lots of love and even more laughter. Hmm, maybe I should stop complaining now.
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Filed under commentary, Depression, feeling sorry for myself, humor, self pity, strange and wonderful ideas about life
Tagged as bad luck, complaints, humor, Joe BTFSPLK