Monthly Archives: October 2016

Stardusters… Canto 16

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Canto Sixteen – Falling Out of Orbit

Alden and Gracie Morrell, along with all the Telleron tadpoles were gathered around the communicator.

“We welded our ship into the side of the space station,” Davalon said to the voice on the speaker.

“Why the Hrrasskattoon did you do that?”  said the angry female voice.

“Hrrasskattoon?” asked George Jetson.

“It probably means blogwopping,” said Tanith.

“Blogwopping?” asked Gracie Morrell.

“You don’t really want to know,” said Davalon.

“Oh,” said Gracie, suddenly realizing.

“We crashed into the side of the station and there were holes in the bulkheads of both vehicles.  We would’ve eventually had explosive decompression if we hadn’t made the two vehicles into one.”

“Resourceful,” said the angry voice, “but you are trespassing on my property.”

“Are you somewhere here on board?” asked Davalon.

“Of course not!  I know better than to be aboard an unaerodynamic space vehicle when I am trying to salvage it and bring it down to the surface through the atmosphere.  I might burn up.”

“You are crashing the station?”  Brekka was horrified.  “We’ll all die!”

“You’re lucky you are not dead already,” said the voice.  “But since you are there, you can do some repairs for me that will help me bring you down safely.  I’d rather not burn the station up if I can help it.  Especially now that I can see you have Earth humans with you.  They might be worth a lot to me if I can get them down here alive.”

“Tellerons are not worth anything to you?” asked Menolly.

“Of course they are.  But I could still eat a dead Telleron, couldn’t I?”

Menolly and Brekka grabbed each other around the necks and did the hugging thing they learned from humans.  Both girls began shivering violently.

“So you are planning to eat us?” asked Gracie in an angry tone.

“No.   I can use all of you if you live through this.  You may have noticed that my world has been devastated.  I am trying to save what is left of it.  I’m not ready for the reality of planetary extinction.”

“How can we help?” asked Davalon.

“I need the anti-gravity coils repaired so I can float the whole thing down.  That will keep the whole station from burning up on re-entry.”

“What if we don’t know how to repair anti-gravity coils?” asked George Jetson nervously.

“I will guide you through it step by step.  You don’t think I would rely on Telleron intelligence, do you?  We often refer to your people as Space Clowns.  There’s a reason for that,” said the voice with a sneer.

“A good reason,” Davalon said softly to himself.

“Say!  How is it that you speak English?” asked Gracie.

“The same reason your Telleron friends speak it,” said the voice.  “Television.   I particularly like the Brady Bunch.  It is my favorite show.  It’s how I know you two Earth people are mere children.  I especially like when Marcia bosses around Greg and Peter.  They almost act like Galtorrians sometimes, though much funnier… and less killing and eating each other.”

“My name is Davalon,” said Dav.  “I am the leader of this expedition.  Can I ask what your name is?”

“I am called Sizzahl.  But we need to be getting to work before your orbit degrades any further.  As far as any of you are actually concerned, my name, for the next few hours, might as well be GOD ALMIGHTY.”

“Oh, good,” muttered Alden Morrell, “a religious lizard-woman.”

*****

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Debates Both Dire and Detestable

I have to confess, I turned the debate off halfway through.  It was mean, gray, and dehumanizing.  Pillory Clampton was easily the person that you should choose.  If offered a choice between tainted water and oozing green toxic waste when you are dying of thirst, you choose the tainted water.  It may slowly kill you, but it won’t turn you into a three-headed mutant moose-man.  Disenhearteningly, the mutant orange bag of testosterone and bile won the debate.  He manipulated the course of the debate to his talking points.  He got away with threatening to use the powers of the president to prosecute her and imprison her for the very thing that the FBI already said she couldn’t reasonably be prosecuted for.  He made his cruel and selfish points directly in her face.

When confronted with his terrible rapist fantasy caught on audio tape, he went on a rant about the supposed sex crimes of Pillory’s husband, suggesting that a man who indulged in his own goatish urges in the past with willing women who later changed their minds, is somehow more important to vilify in the press than what come out of his own piggy little mind in the past.  Maybe on this one it isn’t tainted water, but partially poisoned water in the first cup, but I think I would still rather drink it than what he offers in that glowing green cup.

And the subject of Obamacare came up.  The mad orangutan promised to repeal it.  He says it is a total failure and needs to be done away with.  And it is unfortunately true that premiums and co-pays have gone up to ridiculous degrees.  Especially in places like Texas where the lovely governor sabotaged it by not accepting the medicare expansion and all the conditions of the law needed to make it truly work.  But the orange one will take away the protections that keep me alive and off the street.  I have six pre-existing conditions.  Insurance companies hate people like me.  They prefer the ones who pay the premiums and never make claims.  But I can’t afford all the hospital bills and medical expenses my family has amassed over the last decade.  Heck, I am supposed to be on three different maintenance medications that I should be taking every day.  I am no longer buying any of them in order to afford buying food.  I have cut down severely on checking my blood sugar, because diabetic testing supplies have become unaffordable and the insurance refuses to pay for most of it.  I agree that Obamacare needs to be improved, but I will have to give up all hope of ever seeing a doctor again when I am sick if the old Mexican-hater becomes the next president.

I know my opinions count for nothing.  I have not been in good health, and probably won’t be able to go and vote because of it.  Still, I pray that the next president turns out to be a woman instead of the world’s worst malignant sausage on two legs.  Yes, you heard me right.  Donald is the worst wurst in my humble opinion.

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Good ol’ Dave Winchuk sez, “You gotta forgive ol’ Trump for locker room talk.  He’s jes bein’ a man.

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Think Big, Think a Little…

When I feel like I am losing my battle with six incurable diseases, I often fight back against the depression by doing some big-picture thinking.  How does one little insignificant speck of carbon-based lifeform living on an apparently doomed planet fit into the vast over-all thing that is the universe?  Well, I can shift my point of view from the macro to the micro.  To the tiny little liver cell that just split off an older cell, the great big organism that is me is rather a big deal.  To the tiny germinating thought in my brain that will evolve into this essay, the collection of thoughts and experiences that is my mind and soul are a matter of life and death.  What does it all mean, anyway?  What value does it all have?

I have been a public school teacher who touched more than 2000 lives in my time.  I invented moose bowling.  I have written and published more than one novel.  I have somehow managed to reproduce and father three beautiful children in spite of my many flaws and geek-o-riffic tendencies.  I have achieved success in so many ways.  Even if it all ends in the next hour, it will be okay.  I will continue to resonate through this little world in one way or another for quite some time.  I have affected this world for both good and ill, but mostly for good, and that affects the solar system too because I have been a part of it… and the Orion Spur of the Saggitarius Spiral Arm of the Milky Way Galaxy too because I have been a part of it… and the local cluster of galaxies… and probably even the realms beyond that.

To paraphrase The Desiderata ; “I am a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars, I have a right to be here.”

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Yes, some days when I don’t feel well, I live here… my house and my neighborhood.

So, Lord, this is not about regret or guilt or longing or pain.  This is about celebration.  It is good to exist.  Thank you for every day of life I have ever had.

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Filed under autobiography, battling depression, empathy, humor, illness, insight, inspiration, Paffooney, strange and wonderful ideas about life

Yes, There Are Pirates in Our World

What is a pirate?  A privateer?  A buccaneer?

There are people in this world who are driven by greed and a sense that they have nothing to lose by risking everything to take what belongs to you.  They swoop in on their fast pirate ships, swing on board your little boat, hurt you, steal what you have, and eventually kill you.  Movies romanticize swashbucklers as somebody who takes from the rich and the villainous as a sort of cosmic comeuppance.  But the reality is they are criminals and murderers.

But they don’t carry swords any more.

They are the CEOs of banks.

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Bank-o’ Merricka is an excellent example who sailed their Jolly Roger right up to the gunwales of my little boat.  I underwent a debt reduction program because of five hospital stays in five years that drained my personal treasury.  $35,000 in credit card debt reduced and paid off in three years.  But Bank-o’ Merricka, after they learned I would not be able to pay all the interest I owed, immediately stopped calling.  The debt disappeared from my account.  They had sold the debt to a debt collector and quietly sat on the bill as I paid everything else off.  Then, they filed a lawsuit for the entire amount I owed, plus interest, and plus legal fees.  If I hadn’t hired a lawyer and fought the lawsuit, they would’ve won the entire amount by default.  That’s how they clean out most of their victims and prey, because people generally surrender to pirates who come over the rails with swords in their teeth and burning cannon fuses in their beards.

I  may still lose the battle in this boarding action, but at least I haven’t simply surrendered.  But there are other pirate ships circling my little boat as well.  My evil health insurance company are also buccaneers, and they demand higher and higher premiums and co-pays, and routinely deny all claims.  Diabetic supply people keep calling me and offering free meters and stuff the health insurance pirates are supposed to cover one hundred per cent.  I just paid them $260 dollars of a $500 dollar scam bill that hit my little boat like a cannon shot.

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So, the pirates are out there.  I am still fighting off the boarders.  But I think my little boat is sinking.

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Filed under angry rant, autobiography, conspiracy theory, feeling sorry for myself, humor, Paffooney, Pirates

Binging on Netflix Yet Again

I really appreciate the opportunity Netflix gives me to use television shows to fill the lonely hours of sick-in-my-bed time.  It has almost pushed out reading as a favorite pastime.  Too sick to write or do housework or even draw, I can still live alternate lives in my head by fighting crime with Luke Cage and Sheriff Walt Longmire, or experience the miracles of magic and story-telling with the fairy-tale characters of Once Upon a Time.

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21st Annual SAG Awards

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Luke Cage from Marvel Studios brings to life a comic book hero that I have followed since the 70’s.  It is a bullet-proof fantasy of how a super hero who is invulnerable handles a world full violent evil and fragile people he desires to protect.  I have already watched all thirteen episodes, and may well watch it a second time.  It is, in my uncritical opinion, just as wonderful as Daredevil.  It provides catharsis and relief from a world full of troubles and pain.

Longmire is a cowboy sheriff show that presents both a murder-case per episode and a larger jigsaw puzzle of personal secrets and hard life events that have to be faced no matter how reluctantly.  It brings back the flavor of the westerns like Gunsmoke that I watched weekly in the 60’s when I was a mere boy.

And finally, I also find myself hooked by the sappy Disney-princess show Once Upon a Time.  Literally hooked.  Hook is my favorite character.  And the reason he is my favorite is the something different behind the storytelling in this show.  No villain is unredeemable in this show.  Hook is transformed from heartless villain into an unqualified selfless hero.  The same thing happens with major villains Rumpelstiltskin and Regina the evil queen.  It is sappy and cartoonish, I know.  But the show makes me feel something, and look at things in a new way.

So, for now, that is basically my world.  I have to recover and grow stronger, and binging on Netflix goes a long way towards helping me do that.

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Filed under being alone, feeling sorry for myself, humor, illness, TV review

Benjamin Franklin (a book review)

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I admit to loving dry old history books that most of my contemporaries would wrinkle their noses at and loudly proclaim, “It’s BORING!!!”  But I don’t think the fact that I really really loved this book automatically means that you will detest it.  So bear with me and let me tell you about a book about a historically important and thoroughly fascinating man.

Edmund Morgan is a scholar who believes in using primary source material, and Franklin, as a printer, writer, statesman, scientist, and very sociable letter-writing man left a vast wealth of primary source materials behind to help us understand what was in his mind as he performed some of the most essential services ever given to a country as the United States was being formed.

The book makes us very aware that if history had followed Franklin’s every desire for specific outcomes, we would still be part of the British Empire.  But Franklin was unique among the founding fathers.  He did not serve his own ambitions the way John Adams did.  He did not serve strictly ideological goals like Thomas Jefferson often did.  But his input and pragmatism were essential to helping those two men  create the Declaration of Independence.

He believed in public service as a higher goal.  He carried out not his own will, but the will of the people evident in the debates about where the country needed to go when the government of the British King and Parliament became increasingly unresponsive to the needs and issues of the American colonies.

This was akin to the way he approached science.  He was able to discover enough scientific facts through careful and clever experiments to create practical and life-saving inventions like the Franklin stove and lightning rods.  He led the field for a time in the investigation and understanding of electricity, and the old story of flying a kite in a thunderstorm is not a myth.  It was an actual experiment using what Franklin had discovered about electrical conductivity and insulation to prove that lightning was made up of electrical energy.  Edison and Tesla might never have started if Franklin had not come first.  He never defended, argued, or explained his scientific theories.  He believed in letting experimental evidence speak for itself.  Basically, he became a world-famous scientist by not seeking fame.

Franklin loved to be with people of all kinds, especially intelligent people and female people.  He was a good friend to many, and even maintained respectful friendships with some who chose to be on the other side of the American independence question.  His work on the Pennsylvania constitution, being ambassador to France, and his part in the peace treaty negotiations with England made him as essential to the American experiment as any of the founding fathers who would later take a turn at being president.

All I can really say about this excellent book is that it helps you get to know the man who was Ben Franklin.  And this is a man that most people are bound to love, and every man should know.

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Playing with Dolls

c360_2016-09-30-21-35-18-226 I am still battling headaches, bone pain, and illness.   But I am getting by with bed rest.  And a bit of playing with dolls.

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The hoarding disorder that drives my doll collecting took a hit from Walmart, whose clearance sale shelf offered a slew of Monster High dolls for five dollars or less.

I bought the dragon girl, the mouse girl, the gray cat girl, and the robot girl.

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Of course if you play with them, that means taking their clothes off and switching their dresses.  Just like  a little girl.

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Hopefully, I will recover soon, and won’t be a ten year old girl when I do.

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Stardusters… Canto 15

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Canto Fifteen – Inside the Structure

Nervously Farbick crept forward into the depths of a dark interior hallway.  What was the cause of the crazed Galtorrian monster that killed one cadet and contributed to the death of another?  Was some terrible brain parasite working on the population of Galtorr Prime?  Would it kill Tellerons too?

Starbright was following him behind and to the right.  Biznap was behind and to the left.

“Do you think that was the last of the living Galtorrians?” asked Biznap, apparently to anyone who could answer.

“There were billions of people on this planet the last time we surveyed it,” answered Starbright.  “If one was still alive, there is a very good chance that others are still alive as well.”

“We need to find someone alive to talk to,” said Farbick, peering into the darkness ahead.

“If we find someone, I will skortch him!” declared Commander Biznap.

“We have too much we need to find out about this planet and the shape it’s in,” said Farbick coolly.   “We still need a place to live.”

“We can’t live with monsters that will try to eat us!”

“Farbick is right,” said cadet Starbright.  “We have to find someone rational enough to explain what terrible things happened to this planet.  I really don’t believe that just one terrible thing could devastate the entire planet so badly.”

“All right!  Okay!   I get it!  No skortching!  …Unless I feel any kind of threat at all.  I will vaporize them long before they can tear out my throat and eat me.”

Farbick nodded in the darkness.  He’d be happy as long as Biznap didn’t panic and skortch either Farbick or Starbright by mistake.

“There!” cried Starbright pointing.  In the distance ahead, a door was being pulled open by whatever was on the other side and inside the room.

“Stay in the shadows,” whispered Farbick.

“They can see body heat, remember?” scolded Biznap.

“Have your pistols ready,” suggested Starbright, though both of the others obviously out-ranked her.

“We can not only see you three, but we can hear you perfectly,” came a deep voice from the shadows above them.  “You are on our security monitor right now.  Put down your scary weapons and walk through the door with your empty hands on your heads.”

“Yes, on your ugly, Telleron fin-heads!” said a second voice, one obviously more high-pitched and irritating.  The kind of voice you would expect a monster to have if he were effeminate or otherwise girly yet not female.  Not that Farbick was prejudiced against any of those things, but he knew the voice of a bully and a coward when he heard one.  The late Commander Sleez had a high-pitched totally annoying voice like that.

“We run in shooting?” Biznap asked.  “They won’t be expecting an attack.”

“Yes they will,” said Farbick.  “It is an obvious trap.  We either surrender and walk in, or we head back out and fight our way back to the Golden Wing.”

“I vote going back!” said Biznap hurriedly.

“You don’t have to vote, Commander,” pointed out Farbick.  “You can command us.  But I think we should try to find out whatever we can.  I will surrender myself while you and Starbright go back.”

“You’ve been listening to Harmony’s sermons from the Bible about self sacrifice,” accused Biznap.

“Yes, well, not everything your Earther mate says makes me laugh,” said Farbick in return.  “Her old book has some practical applications too.”

“Okay,” said Biznap, “you and I go forward and Starbright goes back.”

“No, sirs,” insisted Starbright.  “I am not going back alone.  I am the most expendable Telleron here.  Besides, if I went back alone who would fly the Golden Wing?”

“Good point,” said Biznap.

“I thought you had flight training,” said Farbick.

“No, that was cadet Buckabuck,” said Starbright.  “Whootney could navigate and do repairs.  I am a cook and a capable armsman.”

“We’re all going through that door,” said Biznap.  “Be brave.”  He put his skortch ray down first and started towards the door.  Farbick was a little amazed right then.  Biznap was a better leader than he was given credit for.  He led from in front, and took the risks he also expected his followers to take.  Farbick put his weapon down, then so did Starbright.  They quietly followed Biznap through that terrible door.

*****

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Sad Times For a Cardinals’ Fan

 

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Yes, we are out of the playoffs.  Even though we won the last game of the year against the evil Pirates, we fell one game short.  The evil San Francisco Giants beat the hapless Dodgers.  No, that’s not quite right.  The EVIL San Francisco Bullies With a Glandular Problem beat the worthless Dodgers whom you can never depend on when you need them to win!  And so, believe it or not, I must now root for the Cubs to win it all in the National League.  Yes, the Cubs, even though they took the Cardinals out of the playoffs last year during the Cards’ 100-win dominant season, are the least detestable team still in the playoff hunt for the World Series.  Donald Trump may be the next president of the U.S.  The Fukushima nuclear plant has irradiated the entire Pacific Ocean.  Global warming is out of control.  And the Cubs might win the World Series.  Humanity is doomed.

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But it gets worse.  I am also a loyal Arizona Cardinals fan (a condition I have suffered since they were the St. Louis Cardinals, before evil billionaire Birdy Bidwill moved them to Arizona in a petulant fit about stadiums and sky-boxes).

Last year the Cardinals were poised to be Super Bowl contenders.  Even though they lost last year to the Panthers, they were favored to be one of the teams in the big game this year.  But then they lost a squeaker to New England in the first game of the season.  They lost last week to a suddenly potent Buffalo defense.  And yesterday, the EVIL Rams not only snatched victory away in the 4th quarter, they wounded Carson Palmer again, this time with a possible concussion.  At one win and three losses, this will have to be a come-back season… if it is not lost already.  Maybe the world needs to end to put me out of my misery.

 

 

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Happy Doodle Day!

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Dippy Doodle Dave says, “Howdy!”

Still not feeling well, and still constantly being sabotaged by my fritzy computer, I decided to post a double doodle today.  I can post quick and drippy doodles and fulfill my obligation to posting every day while binge-watching TV.  A doodle, as I’m sure you know, is absent-minded drawing that starts without a plan and is sometimes done without even looking at the paper.  I did them in ink with no under-drawing in pencil… kinda like walking around in blue jeans with no underwear on.  Certain kinds of chafing and shifting can lead to unintended things putting a hitch in your stride.

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Doodleburg Castle on the banks of the Doodlestein River

Each of the doodles presented today was completed in about 15 minutes of constant pen-pushing.  So, there you have it.  Have a happy-daffy doodle day!

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