It was a simple plan, really. I paid a review company to review my book and post the result on their website. It was affordable, and research showed that their services were not a mere waste of money. How could anything go wrong?
Well, it’s me, of course. The fact is, my book is not the only book with that same title. I sent them the link to my book on Amazon. They had all the right info to pick the right book. They, of course, picked the wrong book to read and review.
Naturally, they can’t tell the difference between my YA science fiction novel about an abandoned alien boy being adopted by a childless Earth couple and a Hollywood romance between sun-soaked beautiful people.
Oh, well, it would be funny if I weren’t running out of time for making waves with my novel and getting some notice. I can’t seem to get another novel published and everyone is ignoring my little bookie thingy. Serves me right for thinking I have a good reason to write stuff and nonsense.
And of course, it is not my only unique and novel problem. I am currently trying to get essential yard work done before the leaves kill the grass on our yard.
I raked for half an hour with a bad back stinging me constantly, and all I got accomplished was one bag of leaves!
I really need trees that are more housebroken than this. If I drop dead doing yard work, I will die an unknown novelist that nobody ever reads. I am sure several people who have read my work would think that’s actually a good thing, but I’m inclined to disagree with them.
And leaf and novel problems have exacerbated my doll-collecting mania. The third day of April and I have already bought two more dolls after vowing to quit the habit cold turkey. But these are Minnie Mouse and Daisy Duck dolls. How can any doll collector with hoarding disorder resist? At least, two dolls (and their horse) completes the collection…. until they get around to making more of these sweet little things.
So, I have different problems than most people do. But they are still problems. I need to get busy and come up with some novel solutions.
But the thing about monster movies… at least the good ones, is that you can watch it to the end and see the monster defeated. We realize in the end that the monster never really wins. He can defeat the monstrous qualities within himself and stop himself. Or the antidote to what ails him is discovered (as Luke did with Darth Vader). Or we can see him put to his justifiable end and remember that if we should see those qualities within ourselves, we should do something about it so that we do not suffer the same fate. Or, better yet, we can learn to laugh at the monstrosity that is every-day life. Humor is a panacea for most of life’s ills.
“The fool’s mother constantly puts a sign on his bedroom door that says, Clean your room! So he has to do it every day before he can do anything else. One day he decided he didn’t want to clean his room that day, and he made a sign himself. It said, Don’t put any signs on this door! He put it on his bedroom door. But then he read what it said and had to take it down again.”
