Yep, the state of the onion is stinky. The great onion that is our world is hyuge. And it tastes like an onion. Especially if you eat it from the inside out. Mmm… I love onions. I want to eat them all myself, every onion in this garden. But if I am going to do that, I am going to need the support of all sides. Yes, there is blame to go around on many sides. But I need their support to get rid of all the dietary restrictions illegally placed upon our garden by the last onion-master-in-chief. That illegitimate onion-master was not even raised in this garden. He seems to think that everyone has a right to clean, pesticide-free soil to plant their roots in. But all garden vegetables are not created equal. Tomatoes are poisonous. They all have radical religious beliefs that makes them hate our onion-ness. They are therefore terrorists, believe me. They are trying to sneak across the southern border of the garden and take over the onion-growing space that good, conservative, right-thinking onions have and need more of. They are trying to spread their poison in our garden. They want to replace our onion laws with their own stinky Tomatillo Law. And corn. The Corn Party tries to defeat every item on the onion agenda. When we pass a law that all corn voters need to be stripped of their kernels before they can be allowed to vote, they selfishly vote against that law. Government in this onion garden cannot work if they continue to do that. And we need a wall to keep illegal jalapenos from crossing the garden’s southern border. They are not the best vegetables, I guarantee you. They are onion-eaters and foul mixed vegetables. And promises were made to spring onions that were brought into this garden as seeds and now are crying that they deserve not to be uprooted and thrown into distant gardens where they don’t even speak the proper vegetable languages to get by. I know this garden loves those onions. I love those onions too. I want to eat them too. They are very nutritious. But their protections are now gone. I leave it up to the Corn and Onions of Congress to build that wall, and if they do, I will let the spring onions stay.
And now you can heap praises on me for the state of our economy. Yes, I take credit for all the fertilizer I have created by speaking tons of bull manure every single day. The quality of my manure is fabulous… simply fabulous, believe me. It is the finest manure any garden has ever received. And I, Donald J. Onioneater, am the finest onion-master you have ever seen. No onion-master before me has done as well, except maybe for Abraham Limabean. He was pretty great. Although I don’t really know why. Maybe I should have said Andrew Jackfruit instead. So the state of the onion is stinky. And let’s all work together now to MAKE THE GARDEN GREAT AGAIN!
Liars Run the Animal Farm
Napoleon the PIG.
Napoleon the Pig makes himself ruler of the Animal Farm in Orwell’s 1945 book by lying about Snowball, his rival Pig, and blaming the destructive acts of the former human Farmer Jones on poor Snowball. He is driven away from the farm by the farm dogs whom Napoleon has taught to think since they were puppies. This, even though Snowball was actually the hero of the animal rebellion that drove the humans away. Collusion? Perhaps. But definitely a lie. And the PIG Napoleon, once in power begins to keep all improvements to living conditions for the PIGs. Other animals, he says, are happier with a simpler, hard-working life. The PIGs begin to dress like men and walk upright and wear long red ties.
Keith Olbermann in the video is very much like Benjamin the Donkey, who is cynical and skeptical about Napoleon’s methods. He also reads as well as any Pig. When Boxer the workhorse is wounded defending the farm against neighboring farmers who attack and destroy the windmill, he shrugs off the the wound and works at rebuilding the windmill until he collapses. Then Napoleon declares Boxer will only get better if he’s taken to the vet’s animal hospital. But he calls the Knacker (the man who renders dead horses into glue) to take Boxer away. Benjamin calls him out. He points out that it says “Knacker” on the van that takes Boxer away, not “veterinarian”. He points out that Russian Facebook trolls used targeted troll-posts to help get Napoleon his position of power. But Napoleon gets away with his lies. Boxer apparently dies in the so-called animal hospital.
Now, I am not sure which tiny animal on the farm Robert Reich is like, but he is pointing out in this video that once the PIGS got themselves into power on the animal farm, they lie in order to get their agenda operating, enriching all PIGs (or is that GOPs?) and their political donors. They are doing it all by LYING. Pigs lie. We should have learned that lesson by now. They don’t care who dies and gets rendered into glue.
In 1945 Orwell intended Napoleon to be a satire of Joseph Stalin in communist Russia. But I truly believe, as we are living on the Animal Farm now as the hard-working farm animals, that he has a bad wig on his head with whippy straw-yellow hair, and a distinctly orange face, with the same little piggy eyes he always had. And he is in power because he tells lies. And what’s worse, he gets away with the lies. As long as the PIGs are in power, controlling both houses of congress and the Supreme Court, he will not lose his lying grip on the farm. We are all doomed to continue being hard-working animals who eventually get rendered into glue.
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Tagged as Animal Farm, George Orwell, GOP, lying, Napoleon, PIGs, Trump