I have to tell you, although I have not gotten the Coronavirus yet, I firmly believe I only have about a ten percent chance of surviving this pandemic. I don’t expect to see any of 2021 with living eyes. And I don’t find that as bleak a prospect as living through it. Because the pandemic and economic crash it caused are not the end of the bad things coming. I am a pessimist.
That does not mean, however, that I would throw away all the goodness that is there to be had as it all comes to an end. I have no regrets. Life has been good. In spite of the pain and darkness I experienced along the way, I have seen wonderous things happen. I have come to believe there is goodness in everybody, even the really bad somebodies. And I can tell you with certainty based on experience, there are far more really good somebodies than there are really bad ones.

If I do die in the next few weeks or months, I do have faith in the fact that my children have a better chance of surviving than I do. Not all of them have the passion for art and storytelling that I do. But my eldest son tells stories. And my daughter has a passion for drawing and painting… which you can see she does better than I do.
And even if there is a very limited future for life on planet Earth, amazing and enthralling parts of the story are still to be played out. They will still add more to the ultimate story of life on Earth in this solar system in this galaxy… in this universe. And that is the whole purpose for us being here to begin with.
I am vulnerable. I am in pain. But I have not given up. There is more to do. More to think about. More to feel. And I glory in it.
























































Self-Reflection
Every writer, whether he or she writes fiction or non-fiction, is really writing about themselves. The product originates within the self. So, that self has to gaze into the mirror from time to time.
So, the question for today is, who, or possibly what, is Mickey?
I have been posting stuff every day for a few years now, and in that time, I have been much-visited on WordPress. Maybe not much-read, but then, you cannot actually tell if somebody read it or not. Most probably look only at the pictures. And, since I am also an artist of sorts, that can also be a good thing. Though, just like most artists, my nude studies are more popular than the pieces I value the most. But unless the looker makes a comment or leaves a “like”, you really have no idea if they read or understood any of the words I wrote. And you have no idea what they feel about the art. Maybe they just happened to click on one of ;my nudes while surfing for porn.
I rarely get below 50 views of something in my blog every day. The last three days were 86 views, 124 views yesterday, and 88 views already today. My blog has definitely picked up pace over the length of the coronavirus quarantine. But no definable reason seems obvious. Some of my posts are polished work, but Robin is right when he says today’s post is merely fishing with the process, which is true almost every day.
As a person I am quirky and filled with flaws, pearls of wisdom that result from clam-like dealing with flaws, strange metaphors that shine the pearls, and obsessions like the one I have with nudism that leaves me properly dressed for diving for pearls.
I have demonstrated throughout my life that I have an interest in and experience with nudism, though not the boldness to parade my naked self before the world outside of the writing that I do. I also spent most of my bachelorhood dating reading teachers and teachers’ aides, finally settling down and marrying another English teacher. I completed a thirty-one year career as an English teacher, which means I spent a lot of time teaching writing and reading to kids who were ages 12 to 18. Twenty-four of those years were spent in the middle school monkey house. And all of that led to being so mentally damaged after all that I wasn’t good for much beyond becoming a writer of YA novels or possibly subbing for other mentally-damaged teachers in middle schools around our house.
A real telling feature of what I have become is the fact that most of the characters I write about in my fiction are somehow a reflection of me. Milt Morgan, seen to the left, is illustrated here with a picture of me as a ten-year-old wearing a purple derby. Yes, I was that kind of geeky nerd.
And most of the plots are based around things that happened to me as a child, a youth, or a young teacher. Many of the events in the stories actually happened to me, though the telling and retelling of them are largely twisted around and reshaped. And I am aware of all the fairies, aliens, werewolves, and clowns that inhabit my stories. Though I would argue that they were real too in an imaginative and metaphorical way.
So, here now is a finished post of Mickey staring into the metaphorical mirror and trying in vain to define the real Michael, an impossible, but not unworthy task.
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