Tag Archives: Dungeons and Dragons

Wyzoll Hootigan – D & D Professor of Psionics and Magic

In the Dungeons and Dragons game I play with the two kids still at home, they were recently assisted in a killer adventure by a giant owl gifted with full awareness and intelligence.  He is a professor of psionic magic at Morgrave University in Sharn, City of Towers.  I don’t know if you have any idea at all of what the Eberron Campaign is, or can make any sense of any of the things I mention here, but it is a published game, a version of the D & D game currently published by Wizards of the Coast.  The player characters, the non-player characters, and the castle they invaded are entirely created by our little game group.  Professor Hootigan is entirely my creation.  So here is the portrait of an NPC that I created just today in another goofy colored-pencil Paffooney.

Wyzoll

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From the D&D Table

We like miniature figures and homemade illustrations in our D&D campaign.  Let me show you a bit of the excessively obsessive results of this preference.

DSCN5191 DSCN5192 DSCN5195 DSCN5196 DSCN5197 D&D6169 001 D&D6163 001 D&D6167 001 D&D6168 001 D&D61611 001

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Dungeons and Dragons (Revisited)

Since I have been writing a lot about old D & D lately, I decided to repost this essay about playing Dungeons and Dragons.  It is reworked slightly to help mesh with recent posts.  Of course the names of students have been changed to protect the innocent.  I don’t expose real people in my blogging.  I tend to fictionalize everything.  After all, no one should have to suffer the damage to their reputations that Mickian goofishness can cause.

Back in 1982 I first started dungeon mastering for my younger brother and two sisters.  We bought a family set with both the red book and blue book.  It was the beginning of a lifelong love of storytelling games.  You can’t give fanboy dynamite to an Ubernerd and not expect some kind of big old explosion.

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The thing that caught me so completely was the way that you could share the development of the characters and story, everybody at the table adding their two cents until you had a whole lot more than six cents… More like priceless.  And you never knew for sure how it would turn out, no matter how much you planned the plot and plotted the plan.  Events could turn out entirely opposite to what they should have, and inspiration on the spot could alter the essential course of a campaign.

In the beginning it was all about wizards.  The original game featured power that left wizards weak and vulnerable in the beginner levels, but fearsome with fire-balling ferocity after only a few levels of experience.  My brother’s wizard, LeRoy became powerful enough to make himself the king of all of Balindale and the Southern Kingdom .  When the dungeon master raised up armies of undead and ogres and undead ogres to bedevil old LeRoy, the bearded Lord of Balindale could simply summon meteors from the sky and burn them to the ground.  If I presented him with rival wizards who had armies and kingdoms of their own, he pulled a fast one and used his diplomatic dipsy-doo to make them into allies… even the evil ones.  He convinced them to sign treaties with him and eventually to accept him as their sovereign lord.  Thus the Wizard Ganser from mighty Gansdorf was tamed and turned.  When the evil Black Wizard refused to cooperate, Ganser and his army helped to invade and destroy the stronghold of Fort Doom.

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So stories came to be dominated by wizards and wizard personalities.  And then I began recruiting former students to play the game.  The personalities changed.  Goofy Gomez chose to be the wizard, the typical classroom clown who could never do anything straight.  Fernie the Flunkie, a particularly destructive personality, also took up the way of magic with Asduel the Sorcerer.   So in some games, Asdok the Bumbling made jokes and got his fellow adventurers into situations where only the last minute appearance of a kindly, all-powerful Titan could keep them from being roasted in a pot with carrots and potatoes.  In other games, Asduel the Merciless burned cities and castles, made orphans into servants and slaves, and generally frowned quite a lot when the dungeon master  suggested that some Non-player characters needed to be spared or the over-all adventure would be lost for all players.

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So, because of the power of wizards, we all learned that stories could be easily unbalanced and abused by the personalities in them.  We learned how important it was to learn to work together.  When Sir Hogan, the Knight of Tol Arriseah, and Sin Gard, the fighter of the many magic swords got sick of old Asduel, they let the bullywugs and locathah of Eary Marsh first take him prisoner, and then roast and eat him with carrots and potatoes.   And when Asdok the Bumbling set fire to the base of the tower in which he was trying to wring the treasure from the top, trapping his little thief friend, Artran the Halfling up there with him in the body of the ugly girl he had turned him into with a polymorph spell, they allowed him to take a ride in the tower-turned-skyrocket into another dimension entirely.

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Dungeons and Dragons taught us that the difference between good and evil can be learned.   We learned that hitting your problems with a sword or dropping a fireball on top of them did not always solve them.   We learned to negotiate, to feel what others feel, and how to become a different person than the one you are.  I truly believe that the most important lessons you can learn about life can be learned playing D&D.  Morality, camaraderie, and cooperation are not really taught in school, but they can be taught in D&D.

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And now I play Dungeons and Dragons with my own children.  How better to get to know them and mold their characters?  How else can you let them learn why you shouldn’t blow up your neighbors or slay your uncle with an axe except in an imaginary world where the ultimate oops can be fixed with a lawful-good cleric who knows a convenient raise the dead or resurrection spell?

So now I can officially post my Paffooney where Samosett the girl archer and little Prince Robin have murdered Unkel the Magical Ogre to get his chest full of treasure.  Oh, I shouldn’t forget Boffin and Bimbur the dwarves.  They are the ones that brought the group through the Wilderness of Zekk to find Old Unkel’s tower.

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The Black Wizard

Admit it, you’ve been expecting a post about the Black Wizard.  Haven’t you?  Or is it just crazy old Mickey thinking he represents the other shoe that needs to drop?  Well, I do get kinda goofy talking about Dungeons and Dragons, don’t I?

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The Black Wizard had a name that the player characters eventually learned… but I have stupidly forgotten what it was.  So, I merely refer to him by the name they knew him by for most of the game.  He was a personal nemesis to two of the player character wizards.  He is shown here kidnapping Balin, the young son of the wizard LeRoy, my brother’s fifteenth level wizard.  He also faced off against Asduel, the Sorcerer played by young Fernie the flunkie who was in my eighth grade English class for two consecutive years.  Neither one could defeat him by themselves, and they never played in the same game at the same time.  

The Black Wizard lived in Fort Doom, a haunted military base from the frontier of Ancient Starnor.  He had designs on the Castle Kingdoms of the north like Tol Arriseah, Gansdorf, and Selonica.  It was thought that he was the evil twin of the powerful wizard Merlini, but was so twisted by black magic that even Merlini no longer recognized him for certain.  He teamed up with the Red Dragon R’Drak to lay seige to Gansdorf and Selonica.  But the armies led by Sir Hogan and Asduel drove them out of the city of Selonica, and R’Drak himself was slain in the Battle of Gansdorf.  He fled to the Southern Kingdom that LeRoy the Great Wise Wizard had built around the city of Balindale.  His haunted fortress at Fort Doom was near Balindale.  The Black Wizard conspired with the vampire Count Marilinev to turn all of the Southern Kingdom’s people into vampire thralls, but he finally met his match when LeRoy recruited the Raven Wizard Shaumar to best him in magical combat two against one.  He fell from the sky that day in a roaring red fireball and exploded against the mountainside.  Asduel would later capture and imprison his right-hand witch, and LeRoy took over Fort Doom, converting it into a castle for good.  The evil wizard’s young son Kath would be raised by LeRoy as a brother to Balin, and later was converted into a player character, adventuring for the causes of goodness and light.  Kath’s batwing cloak was the only thing he inherited from his evil father.

So if you have become totally fed up with my Dungeons and Dragons memories, find some relief, please, in the fact that there is very little more to tell.  Even goofy old Mickey can’t say too much more.  We played a lot of Dungeons and Dragons in the early eighties, but it was doomed to ultimate limits by Baptists who thought the game was a tool of the devil for corrupting young minds.  Who knows?Maybe they were correct.  I did, however, always manage to have the good guys win in the end and evil be defeated.  It takes a pretty crafty old Satan to turn that into corruption. 

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The Ancient Lost Kingdom

In our original Dungeons and Dragons campaign back in the 1980’s, the player characters followed a series of clues until they discovered the land was once civilized under the rule of Castle Starnor, and Arthur, the White Stag King.  The wizard Merlini revealed to the heroes that the Raggedy Prince whose army of monsters they defeated was actually descended from the White Stag King, which was strange because people believed the myth that Arthur had actually been a spirit stag, a ghost deer with arcane powers.  The prince was cast into the dungeon in the city of Balindale, the city they had liberated from his monstrous army.  The wizard Merlini was able to study the prince up close and learn more.  

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During the Black Wizard Crisis, the heroes captured the Black Wizard’s right-hand witch and cast her into the same dungeon where the Raggedy Prince dwelt.  The two villains fell in love.  Their child, young Sarris, was determined by Merlini to be the rightful heir of Starnor.  He possessed magic from the time of Arthur which turned him into a werebear, suggesting that there was truth to the tale of Arthur’s ability to transform into a stag.  Merlini removed the baby from the dungeon and raised him personally, aided by his young apprentice Pip.  For years they groomed the boy to rule as the heroes searched for the ruins of mighty Starnor.

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It was discovered that the southern section of the kingdom of Starnor was still ruled by the Lich King Frakkus, known widely as Nightmare.  Frakkus had been the Necromantic adviser to Arthur and may have had a hand in Arthur’s ultimate demise.  From Frakkus the heroes learned that Starnor could be magically revived by defeating the demon who had carried it off to another dimension.  They also learned that the only way to succeed was to make an alliance with Frakkus.  The Lich King would remain in control of the South and the fortress of Rau’s Bones.  So, instead of slaying the evil necromancer, the heroes helped him defeat and imprison the demon.  Starnor was revived.  Sarris was placed on the throne and was given the most trustworthy of advisers, including the Grizzled Wizard Gristhane.  Sarris, in the form of a bear, would rule Castle Starnor benevolently, potentially forever.

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The Grizzled Wizard

 One of the secrets of the successful dungeon master in Dungeons and Dragons is the ability to provide the right amount of help with impossible quests so that the players can succeed, arrive at the story’s goal and feel like they accomplished the miracle themselves.  One of the ways I did this was by using a powerful wizard as a patron.  Gristhane the Grizzled Wizard, also known as the Green Wizard of Gorthanc Grotto, was the character I used to do this.

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This powerful, mysterious, and possibly evil wizard set the adventurers on quests that led them to the orc-besieged city of Gansdorf to help the human wizard Ganser, the wizard Merlini, and the elves of the Northeastern Forest defend the city.  He also set them the task of finding the lost prince of Starnor.  Once they found him, they were given the task of locating Ancient Starnor and magically rebuilding the kingdom.  They also were charged with defeating the Black Wizard, a task that led them to the Black Wizard’s master, Lord Frakkus, the Lich King known as Nightmare.We had epic battles.  Of the four adventurers pictured here, only Sir Hogan and Asduel survived the fighting.  

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Always the Grizzled Wizard provided the critical clue or the appropriate magic to win the day and achieve the quest.  Sir Hogan asked him to bring the thief Clarissa back from the dead.  This he did, and the noble knight married her, making her the Lady of Castle Tol Arriseah.  He was an essential part of many adventures, and though he never had the starring role in the story, he was always a crucial part of it.

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The Enchanted Barbarian

The Enchanted Barbarian

This Paffooney is more Dungeons and Dragons nonsense. Back in the early eighties, when elves swarmed over the free lands of Castle Gansdorf, one of the most intriguing adventurers there was the barbarian warrior with no name. He never spoke. He was apparently mute, but that was never proven. He bailed the adventurers out of trouble after trouble, helping to defeat the Black Wizard… Assisting Sir Hogan the noble knight in the conquest and settlement of Castle Tol Arriseah… Locating the hidden ruins of Starnor and revealing the werebear prince who was destined to rule there when the ancient kingdom was reborn… As it turned out, he was not even human. He was an enchanted great sword named “Ral K’uth Fey” and given man-like form by the grizzled wizard Gristhane. Oh, I could spin a yarn back then. We slaughtered armies, conquered castles, and built kingdoms all on the living room floor. I have to admit, though, I sometimes had to cheat on the dice rolls in favor of the story turning out right.

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May 22, 2014 · 11:28 pm

Warrior Elves

One of the most interesting parts of the old-time Dungeons & Dragons campaign were the elves and the part they played in sweeping adventures and war.  Elves, who revere magic and live closer to nature than humans, were a popular part of our game.  Nobody wanted to play an elf, however.  They just wanted to recruit them as NPC hired help.  I was able, though, to create a few with character.  The elf Fernando was a thief and an illusionist.  When a Minotaur killed him, the players worked hard to bring him back from the dead.  Of course, he was named after one of the players, one of the reasons they were fond of him.  The elf Apollo was inspired by the Elfquest characters of Wendy and Richard Pini.  Those comics were read and reread till they started to come apart at the staples.  I still have them.  The Paffooney pictures one of Apollo’s sons who was among the elven legions that defended Castle Gansdorf from the armies of the Red Dragon and the Black Wizard.  Most of the elves died in that battle (which completely covered my living room floor in miniatures and cardboard castle parts).  I don’t remember this elf’s name, but he survived the battle and the castle defenders won, holding the walls of the inner courts.

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Matai Shang

Matai Shang

He was an eight-foot-tall giant with huge muscles and an Ogre’s face. He was a powerful sorcerer and warrior. He stole and adopted the Dark Child of Quran, a little green Cymrillian girl with a huge capacity for future magical power. His giantess girlfriend was a polymorphed half-dragon. His kingdom was made up of conquered cities and rebuilt ruins. Of course, he only existed in a dungeons and dragons campaign set in Talislanta. He lived only in the minds of the dungeon master and the boys in the game. His human player went on to serve in the marines in intelligence.

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May 16, 2014 · 1:36 am

The Wizard Of Firecastle

The Wizard Of Firecastle

This Paffooney is of a game-character wizard. After a hellish weekend of ill health and stress from family and job, I feel much like I am him. My wisdom comes from walking through fires that burned me black. My magic is made from fighting fire with fire. I will continue to walk in the ways of a wizard. My magic is meant to spare folks from my fate by humor and anecdote. But I know that for many, the most I can do is help them recognize the experience and be able to call it by name. I hope that gives them power over it.

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March 23, 2014 · 9:43 pm