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Comic Book Fever

I have long wanted to tell my stories in comic book form, a thing that causes no little difficulty.  Problem one, my arthritis makes 64-page stories difficult, let alone the hundreds of pages needed for a graphic novel.

I do have a couple of things that I have worked on over the years, though.  Here are a couple of things;

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Sorcerer’s Duel is a tale of Dungeons and Dragons players, while Hidden Kingdom is a sword and sorcery tale set in the tiny world of fairies and mythical creatures (made small over the centuries by the disbelief of most humans).  Both are graphic novels that will probably never see publication.  I can expose them on this blog, however, and maybe generate interest in my fiction.

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Danse Macabre

Every good writer writes about love…  Well, not love exactly…   Love.  Every theme, every idea, every character basically boils down to that one very human emotion.   You know that every religion says that God is Love… at least they say the good God is.  But love has many facets, and leads to many other essential ideas.  Life and Death, Sex and Birth, Love and Hate… all are part of the great dance… Camille Saint-Saens called it the Danse Macabre, the Dance of Death, and wrote about it in symphonic music.  I reached a time in my youth where I had to confront the fact that people live and people die and I was no exception.

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I have never believed in Hell.  The God I know does not punish His creations with eternal torment… especially for reasons like having the wrong religion or making the wrong choices.  I have to admit that once I rejected the notion of eternal punishments, I also began to doubt eternal rewards.  Looking forward to a time after life is just as foolish and just as much a waste of time as fearing it.  We do have to look carefully into the darkness, however, because in the unknown  are concealed many traps and terrors.  Fear is a real thing, and it does an important job warning us and making us prepare for the worst.Image

We always seem to associate innocence with goodness and purity.  But as important as grappling with the idea of our own death is, is grappling with the loss of our own innocence.  There comes a moment that we are confronted with the awful truth.   It came for me when I was ten and was sexually abused by a neighbor.  Feelings of guilt and humiliation were not totally new to me, but they dropped on me then like a landslide of granite and lava.  That which is child-like and trusting is replaced distrust, fear, and loathing.

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Where do we find the answer?  Where do we find release from suffering and pain?  Where do we find peace of mind?  Religion can fuel love and forgiveness.  It does it well.  But it also fuels guilt and self-loathing.  Unfortunately it does that well too.  Psychiatry is an inexact science and needs a lot of further research.  So what is the conclusion to this philosophical quest?  What is the answer?  What are the last steps of the Dance?  I tried to sum it up the best that I could in the final panel of my cartoon Danse Macabre.

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Melodrama

Melodrama

This old colored pencil Paffooney once won a blue ribbon at the Art Contest at the Wright County Fair in Eagle Grove, Iowa… back in the 1970’s. Sergeant Peppercorn and his Native American sidekick, Wampum Boy, have tracked down the evil Handsome Harry Hardtack to save Blondie Goodnight from being tied to a railroad track. Don’t heroes always arrive in the nick of time to save the day?

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May 18, 2014 · 2:22 am

Escheresque Snakes and Ladders

Escheresque Snakes and Ladders

I can always dig up an old drawing or two. This one got me an A in Drawing 202 at Iowa State University. Does it fulfill the assignment? Probably not, but I snowed the instructor into thinking I was creative and knew how to draw optical illusions. I obviously don’t know how to photograph pencil drawings… and this is too big for the scanner. But this is Snakes and Ladders, with bugs and boobs and banana-men. Too goofy for words.

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May 17, 2014 · 1:37 am

Matai Shang

Matai Shang

He was an eight-foot-tall giant with huge muscles and an Ogre’s face. He was a powerful sorcerer and warrior. He stole and adopted the Dark Child of Quran, a little green Cymrillian girl with a huge capacity for future magical power. His giantess girlfriend was a polymorphed half-dragon. His kingdom was made up of conquered cities and rebuilt ruins. Of course, he only existed in a dungeons and dragons campaign set in Talislanta. He lived only in the minds of the dungeon master and the boys in the game. His human player went on to serve in the marines in intelligence.

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May 16, 2014 · 1:36 am

Creepy Times, the Second Chapter

Creepy Times, the Second Chapter

As a teacher, you always have to wonder who is pulling your strings, who is the puppet master? It is usually a principal, but today I think it was a colleague. She dumped another monster assignment on me. Individual test score conferences with all our ESL 10th and 11th grade students. They are taking my classroom away from me tomorrow, so I have no place to do the work, nor sufficient time. I apparently get half of the ninth graders too. Then I will called on the carpet if I don’t get this done soon… preferably tomorrow. This from a woman who has no classes to teach and no job beyond paperwork. Why can’t she do all of this extra work? She has the time and an available office. Another of the many reasons I am retiring in June. I love teaching, but nobody lets me do it any more… at least, not the right way.

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May 15, 2014 · 1:54 am

Pooh and Tigger

Pooh and Tigger

I am trying to post pointlessly every day to fill up my blog with… Pointlessly posted Paffoonies. What good does this do for life, the universe, and everything? Well, maybe nothing, nada, zilch, and zahooey. But it’s fun. And maybe I can make someone smile who wouldn’t have otherwise. Isn’t that a worthy woozie?

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May 14, 2014 · 2:17 am

Yawn!

Yawn!

Today was an incredibly hard work day. I haven’t slept now since 8:00 a.m. yesterday. Almost 36 hours of achy wakefulness. Thunderstorms are making my arthritis ache and keeping me from actually falling asleep. I stumble now in five directions at once… forward, backward, to the left, to the right, and straight down. Soon this old clown will tumble down and roll around on the ground and finally fall to sleeeee….zzzzzzzzzzzzz

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May 13, 2014 · 12:31 am

Imagination Made Me Do It

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Is it a curse?  Or is it a blessing?  My mind doesn’t travel in straight lines.  More likely circles, or curly-cues, or just plain scribbles…

Whenever I have a problem, like now, with money, or my children, or my wife, or my dog, or my job, or my… goodness this seems to go on forever… I tend to get screwy ideas about mass public transit via circus cannon, or dog diapers, or little green men invading the Earth and claiming to be from Mars although they are really from a planet one hundred light years away…  Well, you get the idea.  Off topic… outside the box… from deep left field… all sorts of cliches to explain why I don’t think normally about stuff.  I just can’t.  I need to sail on a sea of dreams in a ship with pink sails.  Escape… dream… imagine…  And sometimes it solves the problem, but usually it doesn’t.  And life goes on, but with a little less cash than before, a little less discipline than before, a little less love than before, a little more rolled-up newspaper…  You understand.  The Devil didn’t make me do it.  Imagination did.  And so I must go sailing.

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Laughing Blue

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Griselda by Maxfield Parrish

One of the most beautiful things I have ever seen in the art world are the paintings of Maxfield Parrish.  That’s why this post needs to be about his work instead of mine.  He made his mark painting ads for tire companies and on the ends of orange crates.  The secret to his melancholy beauty is the cobalt blue underpainting he always did.  Of course, the dominant color over all is a ghostly, iridescent blue.  It fills his paintings with quiet grace and powerful emotions.  I love that laughing blue quality more than any other thing I’ve ever seen in the realm of art.
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I love to use the term “laughing blue”.  It’s an oxymoron that sums up me better than any other descriptive phrase.  It is the laughter that goes on so long and so hard that it causes tears, and at the same time it is the sobbing that eventually becomes uncontrollable laughter.  Sweet-sad  feelings of  love and longing,  piles  of  smiles  that  stretch  for  miles.  Nothing is better or wiser or more filled with life.

 There was the time when the church youth group put on the Halloween Carnival.  I had won a blue, helium-filled balloon at the ball toss when beautiful Alicia was watching.  She smiled at me.  It was such a perfect moment that I had to savor it the best I could.  I gave my friend six tickets to put me in jail.  It was two tickets to get in.  Someone had to pay four tickets to get you out.  Tickets were a nickel each.  I figured my friend would leave me in there for a while so I could just sit and contemplate that balloon. I was right.  Mark spent the four tickets at the cake walk.  He won a cake.

In the jail was a little boy, the son of the local barber, who had a bright red balloon.  His mother had put him in the jail as a joke.  He was four years old, I believe, about the same as my little brother David.  His name was Tommy.  Some laughing-jackal teenage boys came past the jail.  One of the doody-heads had a safety pin.  Bang!  The red balloon was no more.  The high school doody-heads took off cackling with glee.  Tommy burst out in tears for his lost balloon.  His mother, outside the chicken-wire cage, was beside herself, pleading for the gatekeeper to open up and let her boy out.  Several church ladies zoomed in to see what they could do.  My mother was one of them.  Before they could get into the cage, however, I solved the problem by giving him my blue balloon.  His mother never saw, never realized he had been upset by the loss of his balloon.  She didn’t notice that the balloon he was holding when he left the cage was different than the one he took in.  It didn’t matter.  No one needed to know the sacrifice I made that night.

Later, at home, I cried.  Yes, I know I was twelve years old and too big to cry about a lost balloon.  But it wasn’t really that anyway.  It was that feeling that filled me up.  It was gladness that I had seized the moment to be unselfish and kind though somehow no one else knew it.  It was sorrow over the loss of my connection to that moment when she smiled at me.  It was beauty caused by ugliness.  It was Laughing Blue.

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The innocent sylph bends down to wake her sister, the sleeping nymph.  The morning has broken on a new day.  The painting has existed since the 1920’s, probably his most famous work of all.  He worked from a photograph to paint it.  Several photographs, in fact.  Wouldn’t the authorities be upset now, this man painting a naked girl?  Artist or no, it could look like pornography to many in this day and age.  Ironically, though, the nude person in the photo he used as a model was himself.  It was only a matter of the play of light over the bare form.  It was a matter of innocent yet sensual beauty.  It was a matter of Maxfield Parrish Blue.  The painting itself is far more subtly blue than it appears here.  It is laughing blue.  It is a mix of youth and grief, the birth of the new dawn and the ancient jagged hills behind.  It is flowers and parched rock, waking and dreaming.  The art of it is in the opposition of things, what Confucius meant when he taught of the Yin and the Yang, what Lao Tzu spoke of in the Book of the Tao.  Yes, it was Laughing Blue. 

I wish I had the talent to paint like Maxfield Parrish.  I loved his magazine illustrations and his faery-tale characters.  I loved everything of his I have ever seen, and I have dug up a lot.  He was a prolific artist.  Almost everything he painted is from before I was born.  He died not long after I came into this world.  I am sad that he can paint no more for me, yet I can’t imagine anything he could do that is better than what I’ve already seen.

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In the book The Little Prince the fox says, “It is only by the heart that we can see rightly.  What is essential is invisible to the eye.”  How true that is!  We cannot describe in words the beauty we see in these works of art.  We cannot explain why it is there.  But we know it when we see it.  It is Laughing Blue.

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