This post won’t be funny. So if you come seeking humor, be warned, every writer has a dark side, and this is about mine.
I have learned the hard way that there is a very special power to be gained from the Dreamlands. But it is a dark and ominous power. When H.P. Lovecraft wrote his nightmare horror stories about the Cthulhu Mythos and journeys in the Dreamlands seeking Unknown Kadath and other forbidden horrors, he may have been writing from real experience. While dreams are couched in metaphor and must be interpreted, they also touch the physical contours of our reality. And not just a light touch, either. Dreams can be made of concrete and stone. Further, I believe the dreaming mind is no longer bound by perceptual tricks we identify as “present time” in our waking lives. The existence of every man is eternal. Existence is beyond the control of the relative dimension in space we know as “time”. In dreams you can actually reach out and touch both the distant past and the future. Does this mean I think I can foretell the future? Of course not. Are you daft? If I could I would be a millionaire and far removed from health problems and dark depressions that define my inner, darker self.
But dreams shape and define my actual day-to-day existence, and not always for the better.
1966 was the year I turned ten, and the year the skies of my dreams turned dark. My best friend at the time lived next door. My best friend had an older brother who was five years older than me. One day that older brother trapped me behind a pile of tractor tires in the neighbors’ back yard. He pulled off my pants and my underpants. He wasn’t gentle. He twisted my most sensitive parts and forbid me to scream by threatening worse torture. He introduced me to pain I never knew could exist before that day. He forced me to endure torture for his personal pleasure. He told me the incident was my own fault and he made me believe it. I lost a part of my soul that day, and I would not remember what had happened for another twelve years, two-and-a-half emotional breakdowns later that school counselors and parents could never explain. I never told anybody about it for years. I could not have even written this paragraph until the summer before last… when he died of a heart attack. He had power over me until I was 56 years old.
1966 was also the year of the tornado in Belmond, Iowa. Both of my parents worked in Belmond. When we were in school that day, we were studying weather in science. The topic of nimbus clouds and storms came up. Mrs, Mennenga, our teacher, pointed out the north window of the 4th grade classroom and said a cumulonimbus cloud was just like the one we could all see in the sky over Belmond, ten miles to the north. She said that was the kind of cloud from which tornadoes would form. It was ironic that that was exactly what was happening. I spent that night at Uncle Larry’s farm knowing that a tornado had devastated Belmond, and not knowing if my mother and father were alive or dead. (My father’s business was leveled, but he made it to the basement just as the building exploded and only had a deep scalp laceration. My mother was a nurse at the hospital, and she, along with the rest of the hospital were miraculously spared. Only six people were killed in the devastation.) Needless to say, I know where my tornado nightmares come from.
So what is the real meaning behind Tornado Dreaming? I firmly believe nightmares auger something in real life. Granted it may be past as well as future, but dreams can come true for good or ill. While I was in college, I dreamed one of my childhood friends was riding in a pickup truck in the back, where no one should ever ride, but farm kids always do. A black tornado dropped out of the sky and knocked him out of the pickup and split open his head. Only a week later, in real life, that same friend fell out of the back of a pickup and nearly died. I had a tornado dream at age twenty-two that preceded remembering the sexual assault by two days. It all came back to me and floored me like being stepped on by the boot of horrendous Cthulhu. As a sophomore in high school I had a tornado dream that found me running for shelter into a house I had only entered twice in my life. It was the house of another of my friends, and everyone there, many of whom were people I didn’t know, were crying over the death of someone. My friend was there. His twin brothers and little sister were there. A woman that I later learned was his aunt was there. His mother was there too. Who were they all weeping for? The following Monday I found out that my friend’s stepfather had been killed on his motorcycle by a drunk driver the same night that I had the dream. Dreams can warn what the future holds. But you cannot do anything to change the outcome. Any attempts I made to change anything may have done more to cause the event than prevent it. So, I am left wondering if this “gift of prophecy” is not merely a curse.
I have a novel or two to write about this if God grants me enough time to write them. I am burdened by the very insight I am sharing with you here. Why am I even talking about it at all, you ask? Especially when I warned you from the start this wouldn’t be funny and practically no one will actually read this far? I must confess. Friday night I had another tornado dream. In the dream, I was in Grandpa Aldrich’s farmhouse, the place where my mother and father now live. My mother and I looked out the south window on the back porch. There, swirling in dark gray-green, was a funnel cloud dancing against an ominous electric-green sky. We were only steps away from the door to the storm cellar. But before we reached safety, the dream ended. What is about to happen? Will talking about it cause something to happen? Is Cthulhu knocking at the door? Only time will tell.
This post is a copy of the original posted in January of 2015.
Now, seven years after I originally posted this dark and scary essay, I now know what this tornado dream meant. My parents were each of them still living at the farm when the grim reaper came for the final visit. It happened, all of it, during the Covid 19 pandemic. Thus, the green sky. The color green indicated a raging growth, in this case, the growth and mutation of the virus. I have now survived the virus myself, the Omicron variant failing to kill me. Of course, neither of my parents got the virus and died of other causes. So, the green tornado may yet claim me too.











Yesterday, before the big game, I watched the DVD I bought of Tim Burton’s Golden Globe Award movie, Big Eyes. It is the true-story bio-pic of an artist I loved as a kid, Margaret Keane… though I knew her as Walter Keane.
















































On the Problem of Always Being Wrong
I was a middle-school teacher for thirty-one years. That, of course, basically means I have to be wrong about everything. Principals have told me so. Parents have told me so. And students who have heard them say so take it completely to heart because, well… Who has the most authority to declare someone else completely wrong?
Yes, I have it on good authority… I am wrong about everything, always.
.
But it is very useful to realize that I am in good company. Galileo was wrong about the sun not going around the Earth. The College of Cardinals said it was so, and the Inquisition forced him to confess he was wrong. Giordano Bruno was so wrong about Copernicus being right that the Inquisition had to burn him at the stake. One would almost think that it is a bad thing to be wrong.
But it’s not.
Science, in fact requires its greatest practitioners to find out all the ways that they are wrong. How else do you create a theory of what is probably right?
It is fundamental to the scientific method to be as right as it is possible to prove. Of course, every scientific theory yields up a lot of anomalies that somehow defy the rules of the currently understood correct theory.
Isaac Newton got thumped on the brain-top by an apple and realized that the same thing that made the apple fall to Earth was making the Moon fall to the Earth, although the Moon is falling at the same rate as it is going around the Earth, so it never finishes the falling.
Later, Albert Einstein would realize that Newton’s gravity would even bend the light of distant stars around the edges of the Sun. And so, he found where Newton, genius that he was, was wrong. And so, the Theory of Relativity was born.
Guess what. Einstein was wrong too.
So, ultimately, it is okay for me to be wrong about things. It is necessary to be wrong before you can find out what is right. So, when I say something stupid like the following…
Comedy is good for you.
You should be naked more.
Fairies are only real if you believe in them.
You must take a leap of faith and live in the world like a Navajo, in tune with the natural world and comfortable with other people living in your world too. Moment by moment in the present moment.
…and eventually, I may stumble upon what is right and true. Or get burned at the stake like Bruno. That happens too.
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