Category Archives: Dungeons and Dragons

The Family That Slays Trolls Together…

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As a family, we play Dungeons and Dragons.  Well, all of us, that is, except Mom.  It’s basically against her religion and means the Jehovah’s Witness version of Hell for us. (Which is a spiritual condition where God refuses to talk to you, and play checkers with you, and then you die.)  But let’s not discuss that here.  I don’t need her to start thinking about reasons to divorce me.  She accepts that it is a thing we do and like and keep mostly to ourselves.  (I just rolled a 15 on a twenty-sided dice to succeed in that charm-enemy spell and avert disaster.)

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As a family we have chosen to use the Eberron campaign available from Wizards of the Coast, the company that now publishes all official D&D stuff.  It is a medieval/Renaissance sort of setting where magic is every-day common and takes the place of science in the real world.

I get to be game master and creator of the basic plots and stories.  My three kids, Dorin, Henry, and the Princess are the player characters who interact with the world and determine the outcomes of the adventures through the rolling of Dungeon Dice.

I want to assure you at this point that my eldest son does not actually have a watermelon for a head.  Maybe metaphorically, but he is easily the smartest and most likely to be a leader of my three kids.  His character routinely pursues ideas like replacing his arms with magical metal arms, or grafting additional arms on his body.  He has chosen the phoenix to be the symbol on his personal flag and coat of arms, but his artifice roll to create the magical ship’s flag turned out to make it look more like a pigeon that someone set on fire.  (You have to watch out for those rolls of “1” on a 20-sided dice.)

Henry, my middle child, likes to play a halfling.  The little hobbit-like character is the one called upon to disarm all the tiger traps and poison-arrow traps that line the dungeon tunnels ahead.  He is a problem-solver in real life.  And he wants to be an architect.  In D&D games, he is often the first one to run up to danger and look it in the blood-shot eye.

Every D&D group needs a wizard or some other magic-user.  Ours has Mira, the Kalashtar mind- wizard.  My daughter’s character can use mind powers to float in the air, pick up and throw things with her mind alone, and figure out ways to do things using as little physical effort as possible.  Oh, and she loves to eat chocolate.  (The character, I mean… or is it actually the daughter?  I don’t know.  It is sometimes hard to tell them apart.)

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In our last adventure, we went to investigate the evil doings going in Evernight Keep, a castle in the country of Aundair.  We were able to not only defeat the evil mind-flayer, Dr. Zorgo, who had turned everyone into golems in the castle, but also to win the castle and the title of the Duke of Passage.  Now that they own a castle, my little band of adventurers will have to defend it, and I know of one old game master who will definitely throw all kinds of evil challenges at them.

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Player Characters

One of the best things about Dungeons and Dragons is that, in order to play the game, you have to play “let’s pretend” a lot.  You start with the notion that you have to pretend to be somebody else besides who you really are.  Possibly you can pretend to be someone who is impossible and could never be real.  You can be an elf, or an orc, or a dwarf… but if you decide to be a hobbit, you can’t call yourself a hobbit because that name is the intellectual property of the Tolkein family… but you can be a halfling… and somehow that gets you by.  And if you are, like me, the “Dungeon Master”, it becomes your responsibility to become the voices for all the NPC’s or non-player characters.  You get to be a multitude of people who are really not you.  And you get to do things that the real-life you would never do… either because it is simply not possible, or you haven’t finished studying magic in the real world, or because you are really not such a terrible person in real life… or not such a good and wonderful person in real life as the elf paladin you play in D&D.

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My eldest son’s character, the leader of the adventuring party.

Ditty Bytcha was my son’s first D&D character, rolled up with dice to be a human fighter and an artificer (a maker of useful mechanical and magical devices).  His name was a bit of a joke.  His back story included a father named Willy Bytcha and a mother who was a paladin of the god Aureon (the blue dragon god of wisdom and knowledge) named Gunna Bytcha.  His grandpa was named Gummy Bytcha.  But as time went on, he acquired a sword named Stormgaar.  It was a magic sword, imbued with the intelligence and memories of the secret agent from Breland that gave the sword to him.  It served as his conscience.  It kept him from stealing from the poor and murdering women and children.  It guided him through moral dilemmas like what to do with a captured enemy.  And it gave him a way to add to his power to defeat evil.  By playing this game of goblins and dire wolves, dragons and surly dwarves, my son learned to negotiate his problems.  He learned that every problem does not lend itself to being solved by hitting it with something heavy or something sharp.  It gave him leadership skills that I truly believe have influenced him as a present day U.S. Marine, and may have led to the leadership responsibilities he has taken on there.

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My number two son’s character is Gandy Rumspot, the halfling rogue and builder of sailing ships.

My number two son decided to take over an existing character, the halfling rogue Gandy Rumspot.  This character was a hard-drinking, charismatic, and thoroughly outgoing little hobbit… er, I mean halfling.  He was really the opposite of my son in almost every way.  My son is shy and over-cautious to a fault.  Gandy, however, took to the sea and took to the air.  He turned himself into a designer and builder of ocean-going ships.  And when they encountered other halflings who rode on trained pterodactyls, he had to have one.  They captured and tamed one, and he learned to glide through the air on the saddled back of a pterosaur.  He has learned to take risks and try the things that might seem scary.  When he wanted to get a job, without prompting, he went up to the manager of a tea-seller’s booth in the H-Mart Asian market and asked for an application.  They immediately gave him an interview and hired him.  He has already earned enough money to buy himself an electric guitar which he has taught himself to play very, very well.

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My daughter the Princess chose as her character Mira Mirkestasia, a soul-gem wearing Kalashtar (a form of mind-reading sorceress).

Mira is my daughter’s character.  It took a while to convince the other two that their icky little sister should be allowed to play the game too.  They were worried that she wouldn’t be smart enough to keep up with what they wanted to do, wouldn’t be resourceful enough to help them overcome evil, and would be too squeamish to kill stuff and kill guys when it needed to happen.  So, she became a cerebral Kalashtar, one of those ESP brainiac characters who can do mind-reading and telekinesis because they share their body and soul with a bizarre creature who fled oppression in another dimension entirely.   In one adventure, she took possession of a mystically powered intelligent throwing knife named Xulo-Mira that would always hit the target (assuming she could make the dice roll) and would always return to her hand.  She became a reader of magic scrolls, a lover of magic books, and, in real life, she fell in love with reading, particularly the Percy Jackson novels of Rick Riordan.  Her grades in school improved.  She has become inventive, creative, and artistic… enough so that she was accepted into the special METSA program for high school next year where she will be able to get college engineering credits and do the things she loves to do while getting her high school diploma.

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The clay dragon the Princess made in art class and wowed the art teacher into blubbering incoherence with.

I cannot claim with a straight face that playing the D&D role-playing game allowed me to train my three kids into wonderful people.  That is just an opinion from a doting father who gets off on playing god in an imaginary universe.  But I have found role-playing to be a useful way to teach things.  Over the years I played a lot of RPG’s in the classroom and at home.  I used role-playing exercises on kids whose behavior needed a lot of molding and modeling.  It can be done in real life, and I am not merely a D&D nerd who only lives in a fantasy world of his own making.  I am a D&D nerd teacher who teaches through a fantasy world of my own making.

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Nerds and Dragons

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I have been a D&D nerd since the early 1980’s.  I have played the game with  brothers and sisters, kids I taught from middle school and high school, and my own three kids.  It was a chance to be a story-teller as the game master, the plotter of plots, the maker of tales.  It gave me a focus for things to draw and books to buy.  Then, I got old, and my kids grew up and didn’t have time to play any more.  So, I end up a sad old nerd with a vast collection of game books and D&D drawings.  So what do I do?  I use them for posts on my blog, naturally.

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Talislanta

In the 1980’s when I was a Dungeons and Dragons nut, I found a role-playing game that was sort of unique.  It was called Talislanta.  Created by Stephan Michael Sechi, it was a game like D&D, but totally without elves and dwarves and orcs and even humans.  It was set on the world of Talislanta with many weird and wonderful races that didn’t exist anywhere else in literature.  I used it to play RPG games with South Texas kids, and the Baptists preached against the demons and devils in D & D.  The only way I could get away with D & D games was by playing Talislanta, where the Baptists couldn’t preach against me because they didn’t know what the heck it was.  So, I created stories and art from Talislanta, inspired by the work of the game’s lead artist, P. D. Breeding Black.

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Kastur, hero and adventurer

Hal Vas was a Jaka wilderness scout, while Xeribeth was a Zandir Sorceress who specialized in spells of flight and levitation.

Orrin, the headless snow wizard, and Teveron, the Tanasian pyromancer were both bad guys who tried to defeat the heroes at every turn.

Magnolia and Willowleaf were both Muses, the butterfly-winged people who used magic mostly for the purposes of entertaining others.  They were attended by the tiny butterfly-winged people called Wisps.

Talislantans were many different colorful races.  There were green ones like the Cymrillians, the Tanasians, and the Oceanians.  There were blue ones like the Mirin.

Sunnyjias was a Cymrillian enchantress while Zoran-Viktor was a Mirin alchemist.

Spooky was a Man-ra Shapechanger who could alter his body shape drastically.  Harun was a Phantasian astromancer who could fly using sailing ships powered by anti-gravity wind crystals.

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And Tazian Thralls were warriors who had elaborate colorful tattoos over every inch of their bodies.

It was a fun world to play in.  Magic and mystery and wacky wizards abounded.  And it wasn’t all about throwing fireballs and whacking stuff with swords… although there was a lot of that too.

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World Building

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As a novelist I am very aware of the importance of setting.  It is an essential part of of telling a story, to be able to set the stage upon which the characters will act out the plot.  The setting pictured here is one created for my family’s on-going D&D Role-playing set in the campaign world of Eberron, here on the continent of Xendrick which was long ago ruled by magical giants.  It is built around details.  There are in this picture three elements that are actually aquarium decorations (the two jewel-eyed skulls and the Egyptian ruin construct in the background).  The silver skull and the Princess Jasmine figure come from gumball vending machines (Jasmine comes from a vending machine in the hotel lobby in Anaheim when we took the kids to Disneyland).  The thatch-roofed house in the background is from my manic urge to create cardboard castles.  The skeleton-faced statue came out of a box of cheap plastic toys from Dollar Tree that Grandpa bought for my eldest son back in 1998.  If there is any kind of point to this paragraph, it is that this detail-rich setting photo is created with unusual parts, parts that lots of people would not think to include in the world-building process.

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If I have any claim at all to a talent for creating a good setting, it comes from my creative juxtaposition of widely disparate objects.  (In English, it means I like to stick weird stuff together in the same place.)  That, of course, is the very definition of surrealism.  Making the bizarre seem natural and right.  It is how you create a science fiction setting, a fantasy novel setting, and even a setting for a hometown novel set in the little Iowa town I grew up in during the 60’s and 70’s.  (You might not fully believe me yet, as I have not published more than one of my hometown novels, but I do have a hometown setting made of a hidden fairy kingdom, a haunted house, a mad scientist’s laboratory, a witch’s hovel, a mysterious sea captain’s house, a house haunted by rumors of werewolves, and a connection to the dream lands that often lets other-worldly clowns wander our streets.)  (That last now holds the record as the second-longest parenthetic expression I have ever used in my writing.)

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Of course, setting by itself is meaningless.  It must be interactive with the characters that inhabit it.  As the dragon crashes through the castle wall behind them, Princess Aurora and her little mechanical body guard, Clockwerky, are not even facing it.  Are they ignoring it because they are actually quite stupid?  Or since it seems to be heading out of the scene to stage left, are they simply assuming it has to be somebody else’s problem?  Either way the setting and the characters don’t mesh in a way that furthers the actual story… at least, not without a lot of additional explanation.

So, can I explain in any sort of a simple fashion how this 500 word treatise on setting is to be understood?  Yes.  Very simply, settings are built of details… lots of details.  And settings and characters have to work together.  Here endeth the lesson.

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Mervin the Minotaur and Barrabas the Half-Ogre each roll a natural 20 to double-slay the dire elephant that was threatening princess Jasmine, while in the background, Oneorb the Cyclops rolls a 1 and bashes himself in the head.

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Filed under Dungeons and Dragons, humor, NOVEL WRITING, Paffooney, playing with toys, setting, surrealism

Fantasy Worlds

If you saw my post yesterday, you have probably already noticed I am not in love with the real world (and for those of you who naturally assume every conspiracy theorist is a nut job, I don’t love the world as I perceive it through my goofy senses).  So what is the alternative?  How about the world of the imagination?

Like many youths of the late 70’s and early 80’s, I trained my imagination with the Dungeons and Dragons game from Gary Gygax and TSR.  I played first with my brother and two sisters, then with kids from the school where I first taught (middle schoolers when I taught them, but mostly high schoolers when they played in the vast worlds of my dungeon-master’s imagination).  I first started buying and painting metal miniatures.  Later I supplemented them with plastic figures, paper cut-outs, maps,  and dungeon tiles.

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I can now lay out a pretty impressive scene to play out the stories that I and my three goofy kids love to spin.  Of course, you know that, although I lay out the potential story as the dungeon master, the players each pick a character and input their own directions and choices through that character’s point of view.

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The characters face the monsters and problems they must overcome, and they must decide when to hit it, when to kill it, or when to try to charm her way through it.

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After the monsters are dead you have to choose again.  Do you cut up the dead Cyclops and eat it?  Do you accept the gold from the princess who is thanking you for saving her and her children?  Do you kill the bratty kids and take all their gold earrings and arm bands?  Of course, the DM tries to squelch option three.

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And then you gather up the group again in the castle courtyard, and away you go.  Another adventure.  Another problem to solve.  It is so much easier than car repairs and school schedules and dealing with a dog that is a walking poop and spare-hair factory.  Dungeons and Dragons life is so much more heroic and fulfilling than real life.

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And then Mom shows up and says the game is over for today.  Time to wash the dishes, vacuum the carpet downstairs, and walk the dang pooping dog.  “Go away, Mom!  We are busy learning about the important things in life.”

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A Random Dragon

Okay, I need to keep my string of daily posts going.  So today, I will show you Pennie.  She is a copper dragon.  She’s been too shy to meet you until now.   But better meet than eat you.

Penny Dragon

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Beast Men

I recently broke out my old Talislanta Dungeons and Dragons book.  It contains drawings from the late 80’s and early 90’s in which the never-ending adventure went to the world of Talislanta where there are no elves or dwarves or goblins.  The primary enemy were the beast men.  They inhabited the great plains in the middle of the world.  They were ravenous, and mostly evil… but a few were adopted as heroes and heroes’ companions.  Here’s a look at the good guys and bad guys I found in the Plains of the Beastmen of Golarin.

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