Some Days the Loonies Are Out

Some Days the Loonies Are Out

Here is a study in Looniness… I have always wondered where the edge is… the border between silly, cute, and creepy. I believe I have found it with this bizarro character study. I attempted to add to the effect by making characters seem unbalanced, off kilter, and even growing out of other characters’ ears. The background pulls at your perceptions and senses as much as the primary objects do. And so… I pull a Salvador Dali with a mixed bag of Dr. Seuss, Disney, and Warner Brothers. Melting and fused toons in place of watches and human bodies. If this isn’t surreal, then I don’t know what is. Okay, I admit it. I don’t know what is!

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March 26, 2014 · 1:26 am

Window On The Past

Window On The Past

This is a photo of Clan Mickey as it was, not as it is. I’m the porky blue one wearing the beat up old cowboy hat. The Filipina next to me is my lovely wife. Dorin on my right… Henry leaning on Mom… and The Princess with her head on my shoulder. They are all much bigger and scarier now than they were then. I posted this most likely because this photo was lost, but I found it while I was at home sick yet again with a painful malady.

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March 25, 2014 · 12:24 am

The Wizard Of Firecastle

The Wizard Of Firecastle

This Paffooney is of a game-character wizard. After a hellish weekend of ill health and stress from family and job, I feel much like I am him. My wisdom comes from walking through fires that burned me black. My magic is made from fighting fire with fire. I will continue to walk in the ways of a wizard. My magic is meant to spare folks from my fate by humor and anecdote. But I know that for many, the most I can do is help them recognize the experience and be able to call it by name. I hope that gives them power over it.

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March 23, 2014 · 9:43 pm

Chibi Exchange

My last post, “The Time is Coming”, was about as down and depressed as I am capable of getting.  I am better now.  Maybe I should explain how I did that.

I brought myself out of depression by grading papers.  I know, teacher cliché, right?  But there is much, much more to it than that.

In my last period class, I have one precious girl student who has been paying me for my many cartoon drawings on the dry erase board.  You see, I have for many years been using my cartoonist skills to illustrate things on the board and draw attention especially to the lesson focus and objectives.  Kids love these.  It inspires them to commit random acts of doodlery.  They imitate my toons and sometimes create their own.  I don’t do Mickey Mouse and Bugs Bunny any more, not because I can’t, but because the owners of those copyrights have become unreasonably litigious and have sued teachers for imitating their copyrighted work.  I only use cartoons of my own creation now.  I have developed my own cast of characters.  Some of my students have done the same.

The girl, whose name and identity I cannot here divulge (it is the law that protects student identities, but I thoroughly buy into the notion) turned in a paper yesterday with Chibis all over it.  She gives me drawings of her own creation because she likes to repay me for sharing my cartoons with her.  She also covers her papers with these things because of the laws of doodlery.  When you are in a high school English class, your life is at risk because you could easily become bored to death.  The first law of doodlery says that you must use every spare moment of the lesson to draw something.  This keeps both your mind and your hands active enough to keep you alive.  The second law of doodlery requires that you make maximum use of every blank part of your answer page.  The third and final law of doodlery is to draw things that are different.  If you  draw too mundane, or too much the same, your mind goes numb and death by boredom is looking in through the windows of your mind.

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So today’s Paffooney, this offering of Chibis, is the same set of doodles that pulled me out of the darkness.  I copied the pencil Chibis from her paper, as precisely as I could in every way except size.  Then I inked them and colored them.   I won’t tell you what the Vietnamese word means or why it is there.  You are entitled to your best guesses.

A Chibi is a version of a manga or cartoon character that is child-proportioned or deformed by an exaggerated cuteness.  I gave the main figure blue hair because in manga language blue hair means youthful, energetic, cool, and introverted, a perfect description for my little Bishoujo, my little Chibi-doodler.  She is now officially a life-saver, a heroine in my book.

Yesterday’s post was dark and depressing, and I fear the issues that created it are real, and they are not going away.  But don’t worry for me.  I know how to handle such things.  And I do have help.

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The Time is Coming

The time is coming…  Every career, every life, has an end.   Today, I barely made it through my three, hour-and-a-half classes.  My lesson had to be cut short and I had to show movies.  I can’t breathe.  My diabetes lowered my blood sugar to the point that I was unconscious for brief periods of time while students watched Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck.  I know… I know…  I should’ve called somebody.  If I die in my classroom in front of some of my students it is going to traumatize them, some of them severely.  Why did I risk it?

One thing is the money.  Every day I am absent because of health, it costs me a day’s salary, $330. I need to fulfill my contract for the school year because I need the money I am owed for teaching.  I will retire when this year is over… if I survive.  I don’t have a choice.  And I have earned a full retirement from the Texas Education System.  I will not be penniless.  That is not the reason I have to keep working.  Maybe I should quit tomorrow.

Still, there is work to be done.  Critical work.  I have the ability to go into a classroom and provide them with what they need most… belief in themselves.  They come to me with their own individual stories, their own problems, their own labels.

“I’m a bad kid,” says one.  “I get in trouble in every class.  I’m every teacher’s nightmare.”

“I’m stupid,” says another.  “I fail most of my classes.  I can’t learn.”

“I’m ugly and will always be alone,” says the third one.  “No one likes me.  If I were somebody else, looking at the me I am now, I wouldn’t like me either.”

Those three kids are always there, every class… every day…  If I don’t do something, they could give up.  They could drop out.  They could die.  I know for a fact that this is so, because sometimes that is exactly what happens.  And if I am teaching that day… at least there is a chance.  I have said the right words… sometimes.  I have done the right things… sometimes.  We do not live in a world without hope.  I am not without some power.  There are other teachers who do what I do, but they are not plentiful.  I am still needed.

But the time is coming…  I can’t go on much longer.  I’m sorry I am not funny today.  I don’t feel much like laughing.  But I still have the power to write.  I still have the right words.  I have to keep telling the story until there is no more.

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Player #3

Player #3

Over the years as a teacher, you run into a large number of students that you will absolutely fall in love with. And sometimes… they will fall in love with you also. Oh, my! What a potentially dangerous situation! But it doesn’t have to end in hurt feelings or criminal charges. Sometimes you find the perfect balance. The little girl that sits in the front row can be the apple of your eye… and you never actually take a bite… and neither does she. It becomes a silent dance of swirling smiles, and laughter. The occasional tear… the valentine card… Making her parents feel good with your testimony about what a wonderful scholar she is. Nothing ever has to be wrong… and if it isn’t, the picture stays with you for a lifetime. One day you will have to paint it. Sweet, sentimental perfection.

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March 20, 2014 · 12:26 am

Sit Right Back And You’ll Hear A Tale…

Sit Right Back And You'll Hear A Tale...

There was a time when students who hated me and wanted to ridicule me called me Gilligan. I was young and thin and dorky, and they really wanted to belittle me. Well, I started calling my classroom “the Island” and they soon realized that Gilligan was on a deserted island with at least two beautiful babes who were also single. (Yes, I did for a while have two girlfriends at the same time in real life… Well, I did. It’s not completely untrue!) The joke got turned back on them. Kids started to like the class. Some, who learned a lot, began calling me “Professor” instead. We went coconuts for a while. I could say “no pun intended”, but it wouldn’t be true.

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March 19, 2014 · 2:06 am

Open the Golden Door

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This postable Paffooney is really not so wonderfully postable.  It got a little bit moisture damaged in the garage where I found it improperly stored.  It is an oil painting from before I had a family of my own back in the 1980’s.  It is called Madonna of the Golden Door.  The girl is my sister, the younger of my two sisters.  The boy is one of my favorite students from the 1980’s, one I fed and helped raise in addition to being his teacher for two years.
This painting inspired the following silly free verse poem;

Open the Golden Door 

Can a man…

Love a boy?

Not a son,

Not a nephew,

Not an in-law…

Just a boy?

Not for lust,

Not for profit,

Not for gain,

But for the gift…

Of being able…

To teach,

To learn,

To coach,

To cheer,

To mentor,

To shadow,

To see,

To feel,

To reach,

To hug?

Simply to love?

I would say yes…

But what do I know?

I am only a…

Teacher,

Author,

Poet,

Painter,

Wizard,

Instructor,

Confidante,

Mentor,

And Friend.

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The Family Outing

The Family Outing

This acrylic painting is called “the Family Outing”. Believe it or not, I painted it before I was even married. How did I know that families have to constantly fight dragons together? Well, before I became the dad with the sword, I was the son watching from the mouth of the cave. The mom in the picture is not my wife. No dragon would ever dare attack my wife. The helpless blonde was more like an old eighties girlfriend, a much less dangerous woman. The dragon, of course, is only just barely dangerous. He represents something like fear of death and dismemberment, not the kind of life threatening dangers of married life, like credit card bills.

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March 17, 2014 · 1:43 am

The Aztec

The Aztec

This acrylic painting on canvas board represents 23 years of teaching at a middle school in Cotulla, Texas. President Lyndon B. Johnson once taught in Cotulla. He referred to it as the “donkeyhole” of Texas, but for some reason always spelled donkey with an “a”. Many of the students are Spanish speakers. What am I saying? MOST of the students are Spanish speakers. Their version of Spanish, though, has many Native American words in it, especially Aztec words. Almost all of my students, though, were not Mexican. They were born in the U.S. Most were born in South Texas.

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March 16, 2014 · 1:12 am