Here’s wishing that Christmas elves find you this day. The Santa’s elf in the Paffooney is holding up greetings from snowflake elves and storybook elves to help you feel entertained, mystified, and victimized by elfshot. This season of Tchaikovsky Nutcracker elves and Fantasia elves and jolly old Saint Nicholas is constantly trying to frizzfry your senses and make you have feelings that pierce the hard-hearted feelings of everyday usual people living life with no magic and no imagination. Nuts to that! Christmas nuts! Nuts roasted on an open fire. Jack Frost nipping at your nose. Nuts carolling in the snow outside your door hoping you have some hot cocoa to spare because they were nutty enough to go out singing on a cold night with Jack Frost in a nipping frenzy already before they even began putting their nutty noses at risk. (Okay, maybe I don’t wish Jack is one of the Christmas elves that find you. They are not all wonderful.) And that magic that elves bring is the magic of being together with family, the magic of love. So here’s wishing that elves find you on Christmas, and you’ve run out of Scroogie elf repellent just in time to feel the love the season brings, and before the mangled elf-metaphors melt in the light of reason and rationality that take hold of us all the rest of the year.