Things Are Not Fine in Carrot Castle

We were expecting Princess Kayflower to ascend to the throne after the sudden demise of King Brusselsprouts. King B had come to be referred to as Dark Sprouts because he kept foiling the evil former King Toadstoolsniffer in his evil attempts to overthrow and usurp the Throne. Rabbits, bunnies, and hares were all believing old Brusselsprouts would live forever. He was ancient, but he had a magical way of making the carrot crops bounteous and delicious, and he sometimes said stupid things in a way extremely old rabbits often do, but he gave off an undefeatable positivity that was reassuring to the older, wiser rabbits. And then he got brain freeze from an ice cream cone and suffered a bunny stroke.

Toadstoolsniffer leaped into action on King B’s demise, mostly because Kayflower was wrapped up in grief and funeral arrangements, and spewed forth a virtual geyser of misinformation and propaganda. The fat white bunny with orange powder on his face began claiming that there were weasels on the border, and that while he lived, King B had invited them into the city of Carrot Castle and let them eat bunny children wherever and whenever they wanted. This was not true. Only two weasels had shown up at the border, and the Royal Guard Hares easily chased them off with bucktoothed bites. Toadstoolsniffer then claimed that when bunny children went to bunny school, King B would have bunnies surgically changed into kittens, and baby rabbits surgically changed into puppies. The truth was that it was completely illegal to perform any kind of surgery on bunnies and baby rabbits without parental consent and medical need. It never happened. But the general rabbit population of the city-state tended to believe anything Toadstoolsniffer said because he said it in such a bigly white-rabbit way. And of course, everyone knew that white rabbits like Toadstoolsniffer were somehow superior to all others of rabbitkind.

So, in spite of all logic, loyalty, and adherence to the truth, the rabbits of Carrot Castle made Toadstoolsniffer the new king. He, of course, swiftly made an alliance with the weasels of Stoatia, letting them come wherever and whenever t.hey wanted into the city-state. They ate Kayflower first, then quickly reduced the rabbit population by breaking into the bunny schools and eating all the bunnies they claimed were now kittens and all the baby rabbits that were now puppies. And they all lived miserably ever after… unless they got eaten.