
Canto Fifty-Three – The Morrells’ Assigned Sleeping Nest
Alden was bone weary as he and Gracie finally found the nest that Sizzahl had assigned to the two of them. It was a weird little alcove made of artificial stone, with what appeared at first glance to be a huge pile of sticks and leaves in the middle of the central depression of the floor. The bedding materials were also artificial, however, made from some sort of foamy material and quite comfortable to recline on.
“Oh, Gracie,” said Alden, “I am so relieved to be able to wear clothes again. I really couldn’t stand being naked around the children all the time.”
“I actually liked being naked, Alden. It made me feel nice and so very free.”
“It’s like being totally vulnerable, like someone or something could take a bite out of you at any moment.”
Gracie looked suddenly concerned. “Do you think our poor Brekka is safe with that awful man-eating plant thing?”
“Yes, I do. It actually seems to take care of her. I worry more about Sizzahl being safe with this uncle of hers. Makkhain doesn’t seem very trustworthy to me.”
“You are such an old poop sometimes.” Gracie looked a little put out. “He’s her uncle. He’s family. Surely we can trust Sizzahl in his care.”
“But what about the rest of us? Are we safe from Makkhain? To him, we are the invading aliens. And it’s no secret that the Galtorrian lizard-people will gladly eat human and Telleron flesh.”
“Well… yeah. I don’t completely trust him either. His weird, snaky eyes are creepy. He’s not quite as human-like as dear little Sizzahl.”
“Gracie, I kinda like Sizzahl too, but you have to remember that she has no regrets about using us for her own purposes. As soon as she learned we were Earth humans, she wanted to use us for her little Galtorrian/Human crock-pot experiment. She’s cooking up ten children already, made from our… I mean, my DNA.”
“But when you stop and think about it, Alden, those ten little test-tube babies are your sons and daughters… your actual flesh and blood. Doesn’t it excite you, at least a little bit, that you are finally going to be someone’s Daddy?”
The thought actually hadn’t hit Alden quite as hard as it did at that moment. He almost swooned as he lay down on the soft nest-bedding. “They are half mine and half Sizzahl’s,” He said. “And they are going to be born from glass jars!”
“Cloning vats for warm-blooded children,” said Gracie. “And since they are your children, doesn’t that make them mine too?”
Alden knew that back on Earth, not being able to have children had practically killed Gracie. It was the reason she had been so anxious to adopt Davalon when they found him on that country highway, alone and left behind by his space ship and his people.
“Gracie, how do we do this? We are living on an alien world now, possibly permanently. We are two grown-up people from Earth trapped in the bodies of children. You can never grow up. And if I grow up without you, I… Well, I simply can’t do that. So how do we raise ten children all the same age? And not just any children, half-lizard children!”
“They’re your children, Alden. And I will love them as my own until the day I die.”
“The day you die may never come. And I may have to keep making myself younger every year by Telleron technology to stay even with you. I may be alive forever too.”
Gracie smiled as she crawled on top of Alden in the middle of the Galtorrian nest. “Love me tonight. You haven’t loved me since we became like this.”
“Gracie, you have the body of a little girl.”
“But I am an adult, no matter how young my flesh is. And I love you. We have a family now. Don’t you feel young and alive again too? Like I do? Love me.”
There was no arguing with Gracie. How could he do anything but love her?
*****

Stupid Is as Stupid Does
This is not a tribute to Winston Groom and his famous creation, Forrest Gump. This is an admission that when I have had very little sleep and lots of worry lines on my brow, I often do remarkably stupid things.
And sometimes, doing something monumentally stupid makes me feel better. You know, more a part of the stupid, meaningless, and goofy world around me. So, what stupid thing did I do? I joined a nudist organization’s website. Me, who freaks out when members of my own family happen to see me naked. And, you see, there is more to joining this organization than just signing up for some random thing on the internet where you get a lot of random emails. I had to submit nude photos of myself to be posted in community forums. And I may be able to write a blog for this website, which will mean taking some camping gear and actually going to the naturist club site near Dallas to experience the things I will be writing about… and probably making jokes about. But don’t be afraid of being subjected to the hideous torture of having to see me naked. In order to see any of that, you would have to join the organization yourself, and you are probably not as stupid as me. (But I am not telling you the name of the website anyway.)
This is a detail from an illustration based on Golding’s Lord of the Flies. But it is also a picture of me and a childhood friend from back in the skinny-dipping days, based on an old black-and-white photo.
You see, I have some real life experiences with nudists before this happened. I had a roommate in grad school who liked to go au naturel, and even was comfortable with me being in the room when his girlfriend was visiting. He was nude in the kitchen one time when my grandparents came to visit. It is a good thing my grandfather entered that room ahead of my grandmother. I also had a girlfriend in the eighties who had a sister living in the clothing-optional apartment complex in Austin, Texas. Every time we visited Austin, the city nearest where my parents lived, she would stay with her sister there and I would have to go in to fetch her whenever we had plans. Sometimes I was there just to visit. But always, since clothing was optional, I took that option. I did get used to being around naked people, though. I actually have nudist friends.
So, though I am not a nudist, I guess I already know a lot about how to be one. It is how I managed to stumble into this awkward arrangement.
I know I will never be able to get my wife to go along on this harrowing adventure. She refuses to even consider going nude in the house. She has to wear clothes to bed even though studies say that sleeping nude is good for you. I will be facing this basically naked and alone. And possible paid writing work will never make this worth it by itself.
But my photos are already posted and approved. My membership is a real thing. And I am not ready to shoot myself for this stupid decision. In fact, I will probably be less naked there than I have been here in this very blog where my every secret is laid bare and made fun of on a daily basis.
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Filed under battling depression, commentary, feeling sorry for myself, humor, nudes, Paffooney, self pity, self portrait, strange and wonderful ideas about life
Tagged as bad decisions, humor, naturists and nudists, stupid stuff, stupidity